October 2010
I’ll press my lips to yours to explain
Sporadically use my tongue to reiterate
In the form of an oxygen dream
I’m dying to breathe you deeply
I know I sound repetitive. Cause I’m repeating myself.
And I’m competitive, I want you all by yourself.
And that alone is just the problem
I’ve got these woes,
And I just can’t solve them.
If I could gather up the nerve,
I’d put my feelings into words,
And if I weren’t so young, or stupid, or restless,
I might be able to just soon forget this.
Just forget this. just forgive this. just forget this…
If I weren’t so young, stupid , or restless, I might be able to just soon forget this.<3
I’m sitting here attempting to contemplate this madness.
I knew that i was going to have a moment of revelation. A flashback to whatever the hell state of mind i was in over the summer. But i never thought it would come back so soon. As if it were a totally different time, setting, everything.
Because it wasn’t.
But it was me. Me lost in my own confinements of whatever the fuck. I miss how it felt to be so small, so different. How i was terrified of living, and how that one thing took control and sent me into straight insanity.
Life is almost… blank. But not the blank it once was. It’s just average. Like that phase of my life never exsisted.
So I’m sitting here right now, contemplating the truth. The period of time from when i lost myself and everything i had. To now.
That you can actually change yourself. Or change whatever the hell. How the past was only 2 months ago. But it seems faint. And how i could really miss it.
Change happens. You do it yourself. Sometimes you don’t even know.
Apologize. Accept. Adapt.
Grenade - Bruno Mars
I guess it doesn’t really bother me that much these days.
See, i’m trying to do this thing where..
I don’t let the past bother me.
It fucked me over, alot.
And because the truth is
It was the past.